Last night...

I spoke for the first time in my life. I had the privilege of speaking to the youth at our church. God laid it on my heart a long time ago to minister. I didn't understand it then, but I did begin writing a bible study focusing on finding out who you are in Christ. I pursued it but it wasn't His timing. It was missing the Truth. Had I pursued it in and of myself, it may have bore some fruit, but it mostly would have just been frustrating and I would have gotten burned. And in a way I did burned because I pursued it, to a degree, and hit a dead end. So I just kept it in the back of my mind and knew that when God brought it back up, it'd be His timing and He'd give me everything in which to fulfill His calling on my life.

Fast forward to now... At the beginning of this year God called me back into ministry. I didn't know how it was gonna work but I knew it was specifically for helping people find their identity in Christ. I realized, in my own life, that nothing was making me happy and nothing was satisfying my need to feel like I belonged. When I started learning about God's grace and about His truth, I began to see His plan for my life and for life in general and it has lit a fire under my butt and I just can't contain it!

About 2 months ago I had asked my good friend, Hannah (youth pastor's wife), if they needed help at the youth group. I was kind of just testing the water to see if God was really calling me into ministry right now. Well, a few weeks after that she asked me to come along to youth group one night because they were splitting the boys and the girls up and talking about love and relationships. So I went and quietly observed the girls and listened to their stories. I felt compelled to share my story the following week. I had never spoke in front of people but it didn't frighten me. I had complete peace and just a knowing in my heart that He was speaking through me, and that I am simply a vessel with a mouth and a story. So I shared my story with about 8 girls that following week.

What I have found in the past 6 weeks is that when God calls you to do something, He gives you a will and a way. He also gives you butt load of courage and strength that you didn't know you had in you. And when He calls you to do something, you cannot keep silent. Not only will you be blessed, you will bless others.

And what I found last night is that even if my words sound like my words, it sounds like Jesus to the enemy. (thank you beth moore!) I have the awesome opportunity to share my heart with the entire youth group for a couple of weeks. Last night being the first. And although I trailed off from my notes and lost my place several times and had a complete brain-fart, I know God still used me. And He gave me an awesome friend in Hannah and she perfectly summed up the night and what I was saying. I did so much better when I wasn't looking to my notes for help and just talked. Lessons learned...

I thought I'd share what I talked about last night. Written out, it makes a whole lot more sense.

The Lord laid Jeremiah 29:11 on my heart.

"For I know the plans I have for you,"

declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you

and not to harm you, plans to give you

hope and a future."

And as I was preparing for my little series for the youth, I kept coming back to this verse and how encouraging it is. So I decided to talk about each part of the verse. 

1) "For I know the plans that I have for you," declares the Lord

HE has plans for us! Psalms 139:13 says that He knit us together in our mother's womb. And Jeremiah 1:5 says that even before He made us in our mother's womb, He knew who we were. Regardless of how we got here or whether or not our parents wanted us or were ready for us, He was ready for us to come to earth and live out the life that He set before us. We are here on purpose. He has a plan for our lives that HE created and HE created us to live out that plan. And we are all uniquely special because we all have a specific calling.

He knows the plans He has for us. 

2) "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, (i just wanna bold this whole part it's that good)

But He also gave us something called freewill and with that freewill we can choose to walk away from these plans that He has for us. I have found though that when you walk away from His chosen path for you, He brings you back to where He wants you. Those paths that are away from Him can bring on a lot of damage and stress and anxiety. And not because He is 'teaching us a lesson' so therefore making our lives harder but because we've stepped away from His plan and therefore cause a lot of drama for ourselves. A lot of the 'bad things' that tend to happen to us comes from us being stupid or from other people acting within their freewill. But that is a whole other something that I'll share with you soon...

My point is that, His plans are great. Sometimes it's not something easy (like speaking in front of people) but His plan is ALWAYS better and He always gives us the tools to succeed. He will never harm us. He is love and cannot act outside of who He is. He gave us grace through His son dying for our sins and therefore has given us freedom from all that condemns us. We are free in Him. And your life is forever changed for the better when you are following His plan. 

We can try and try to do things that we think are best. We can try and make our own way. But I have found though that this often causes stress and unexplained unhappiness and discontentment. I get a gut-feeling and I am learning to let that gut-feeling speak louder then me. 

I have also found that when i'm in one of those predicaments, it's easier to let God get me out of the mess I make then to try on my own. And that letting Him take care of a concern in my life, heals the whole wound forever and is not a short-lived quick-fix. But that is another whole other thing I'm going to share with you sometime. 

3) plans to give you hope and a future."

He doesn't mean that if you don't follow His plan that you won't have a future and He'll kill you off. It means that with Him you can have a future. And good future fulfilling your life's calling and living in the freedom of His grace. But more importantly, an everlasting future. Not weighed down by heartaches and troubles or even by death. 

Next week I'm sharing about what those plans for our lives might be...